In Florida, in the 's, the Sheriff husband of the "Housewife Hooker" hid in the closet videotaping his "nymphomaniac wife" with other men notably republican politicians , whom the husband then blackmailed. This might sometimes, though very, very rarely. Historically, such men have been beaten, ostracized and ridiculed, and regarded as weak, "sissy men. In England, men would sometimes set up their wives to be seduces by a man, so that the husband could then sue the man in court. But, as she described the enjoyment her husband had at watching her and having "after" sex with her, with the other man's ejaculate inside her, the wife became concerned that maybe her husband was gay. It might happen, but it's a lesser answer than all of the above. The financial part is a piece that can't be ignored, as it has been around for a long time. While the wives by and large were happy with things as they were, the husbands often felt their wife's loss of sexual satisfaction more strongly than the wife themselves, and were motivated to encourage the wife to sleep with other men. I will tell you that in the research for my book, I heard lots of varied reasons for this desire from various husbands.
Historically, such men have been beaten, ostracized and ridiculed, and regarded as weak, "sissy men. I saw many men who reported that their wives were highly sexual beings, with a greater sexual capacity, and it simply turned the husbands on and pleased them to be able to see their wives sexually satisfied, at a degree that a single husband couldn't match. So, I thought I would use this posting to explore these issues, and invite discussion of what these various reasons might be. Masochism was named after him. Sometimes, the husbands were very concerned about being seen as heterosexual, but they spent an awful lot of time looking for well-endowed men for their wife. Watching your wife have sex with another man may be a next step, or progression, from watching yourselves have sex by having a mirror on the ceiling during sex, then using a video camera during sex, and then finally watching one's spouse with someone else. I did see a number of men who reported that due to physical complaints, they weren't able to be as vigorous in bed as they and their wives would like. I think a discussion of this phenomenon deserves consideration of all the reasons and motivations. This might sometimes, though very, very rarely. Can you think of other reasons I missed? While the wives by and large were happy with things as they were, the husbands often felt their wife's loss of sexual satisfaction more strongly than the wife themselves, and were motivated to encourage the wife to sleep with other men. But, it is at root of Dan Savage's past responses to these men, a response that Savage and Ryan didn't repeat in this column. It's not always about the money. Nearly every couple I interviewed told me that after an episode of the wife having sex with another man, the couple felt like they were "in heat. Many of the men expressed that through their wife's open sexuality, the couple was actively and consciously rejecting social pressures to suppress female sexuality, assert monogamy and patriarchal power. The first letter he answered was from a woman whose husband wanted to watch her have sex with another man, a request she fulfilled. I like Ryan's responses, especially the nonpathological view, but think that this is a very complex behavior, with a lot more reasons behind it. If they are used to such a voyeuristic process in their sexuality, there is some legitimacy to suggesting they may incorporate it into their marital sexuality. In Florida, in the 's, the Sheriff husband of the "Housewife Hooker" hid in the closet videotaping his "nymphomaniac wife" with other men notably republican politicians , whom the husband then blackmailed. Leopold posted ads in German newspapers of the day, looking for "energetic young men" to befriend and pleasure his wife. I will tell you that in the research for my book, I heard lots of varied reasons for this desire from various husbands. Hopefully through their partnership, Christopher Ryan opened Savage's eyes to the wide range of other explanations. Some of these men talked about treating the wife as a whore, as a piece of meat, and "taking her down a peg. It's a great read, and a wonderful plug for Ryan's new book, Sex at Dawn. Per Sherfey's research, women have documented as many as orgasms in a single hour. Usually, Savage quotes the "eroticization of fear " hypothesis, that these men so fear their wife's infidelity that they eroticize the fear, in order to reduce the anxiety, managing it by sexuality, until they have turned the fear into a sexual fetish. Wives simply do not often or unprompted go to their husbands and request they have permission to have sex with other men.
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