But for highly anxious people, it was a different story. They also completed a measure of relationship satisfaction. Generally speaking, it appears, birds of a feather romantically flock together. Well, no, not necessarily. She is also the author of the forthcoming book Paleo Love:
But Hudson and Fraley took their investigation an intriguing step further. Psychologists say couples who are too similar to each other are less likely to last. Mehta provides speaking engagements for your organization and psychotherapy for adults. Generally speaking, it appears, birds of a feather romantically flock together. Given that attachment fundamentally shapes how people function in romantic relationships, they wanted to test whether adult attachment style influences the association between partner similarity and relationship satisfaction. Insecure attachment breaks down into two types: Its public health department conducted three years of psychological profiles on adult men and women for the journal Personality and Social Psychology Bulletin, They were questioned on their relationships, levels of intimacy, overall satisfaction, closeness to their partner, how often they thought of breaking up, commitment and depression. But are they happier in their relationships? New research suggests that when it comes to matters of the heart Partners who were similar to each other in terms of agreeableness and moderately similar in terms of emotional stability were more satisfied in their relationships. If we were practically the same, we would be bored out of our minds! Those who are high on attachment anxiety are preoccupied with how available others are, and have a negative view of themselves. They recruited couples in romantic relationships and gave them a battery of tests five times over the course of a year approximately once every two months. Why does this happen? The study began with couples—including one gay couple and one lesbian couple. Specifically, they wanted to examine whether couples that are more similar in terms of personality are more satisfied than those who are more dissimilar. By contrast, sharing the traits of extraversion, conscientiousness, and openness did not predict relationship satisfaction. Seventy-four percent of the sample was white, and their ages ranged from 18 to 25 years. Connect with Vinita Mehta on the web at drvinitamehta. There is also a theory that our natural attraction to our opposites is a subconscious way of forcing us to deal with the weaker aspects of our own nature. Attachment develops from the relationship between infants and their caregiver, with particular respect to responsiveness and availability. We are naturally drawn towards people who have strengths which we are missing. So, though opposites attract, can they be happy with each other and sustain a relationship? The results were striking. Securely attached people are low on attachment avoidance and anxiety, and demonstrate higher levels of adjustment in their relationships. The effects of early attachment are far-reaching, establishing how we perceive ourselves and others as we grow into adults.
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